Hiding so many unpublished posts away in my thumbdrive, too lazy to publish them all, only to feel like blogging something.
Call it an impulse, an urge, whatever.
I'm sure everybody out there has wondered and asked themselves these questions at least once.
"How many of the friends I have right now are true friends?"
"For how long will they stay?"
To some, true friends don't even exist.
It's like what if one day you feel like dying, already on some rooftop preparing to jump off, only hoping somebody would suddenly come over to stop you.
Maybe, maybe some of these friends would bombard you with tons of text messages, calls and all, but none of them actually bothered to come look for you. Maybe they did think of it, but at the end they could just somehow come up with something and decided you won't actually end your life.
Okay i really don't know what's up with all the committing suicide stuff (-_-....) but it just randomly popped up.
When something happens, some people will go like "Yeah i understand." But how many actually do?
Just want to live my life how i want it to be, from this moment on. Don't wanna give two fucks about how people think of me or whatever. I shall plan my time how i like.
It's like some people just don't understand how busy and tired i am. They can say "i can do it so can you" all they want but fuck it. Fuck all of it. Yeah you can do it but i'm different from you. You won't understand what i have gone through, and how hard i am working just to keep it all together. I am in no position to give up what i have now, i cannot and will not give up.
Maybe after this entry some people just want to start to FP me because they assume i'm talking about them. But whatever. Do what you like.
I am too tired to care anymore.
